So you want to give your partner a blowjob but there's one pesky problem: your gag reflex! Every time the pickle in question reaches a certain point on your tongue, you feel like a cat with a hairball. 

Though it may seem like you're doomed to a life of kissing and licking (nothing wrong with that, I say!), there are some tricks that you can help you go a bit deeper. Let's dive in.

Tip 1: Breathe and Relax

Let me start by saying that these are not tips for how to deep-throat without gagging. I'm speaking to folks who can barely brush their tongue without gagging and need a little help feeling more comfortable performing fellatio in general.  

Keeping your body and throat relaxed can help you give a gag-free blowjob — and enjoy it more, too! Many of us with sensitive reflexes tense up on instinct when faced with a real live pickle. But if you go into a blowjob holding your breath or clenching your throat muscles, your gag reflex may read that as a cue to spring into action.

Instead, take a moment to center yourself before you begin. Try the 4-2-6 breathing exercise to relax your throat:

• Close your eyes
• Breathe in for 4 seconds
• Hold your breath for 2 seconds
• Breathe out for 6 seconds
• Repeat for a few minutes, or until you feel relaxed and ready to dive back in

Tip 2: Shift Your Focus

Focusing on what you don't want to happen — in this case, gagging — can actually make it more likely. Shift your thoughts by using a mindfulness technique. Focus on your senses to bring yourself back to the moment. What do you see, hear, taste, touch, and smell? Go through all of your five senses, keeping your mind and energy in the here and now. 

You can also think about the pleasure you want to give your partner. It can be powerful and rewarding to give pleasure to another person — focusing on these feelings to help you feel strong, sexy, and less anxious. 

For more about getting in the mood: What Is Foreplay?

Tip 3: Use Your Lips and Tongue

Let's dive into some specific techniques for using your lips and tongue while your mouth takes a breather. Remember that you can use one or both techniques at once — whatever combination you like best and feel most comfortable with.

Lips

Lick your lips, making sure they're good and wet (feel free to make eye contact while you do it!). Then purse your lips while keeping them soft. Then rub them up and down each side of the penis in a smooth, slick motion. Whenever you reach the top, apply some drool to the head, before taking your lips back down the side.

Feel free to kiss and essentially make out with the entire johnson from top to bottom until you're ready to dive back in with your full mouth.

Tongue

Put your tongue out as far as you comfortably can while keeping it soft and flat. Take your partner's penis in your hand and slide it across your tongue from side to side. Not only does this feel great for them, but it requires minimal mouth effort and makes for a stunning visual as well.

You can also lick the underside of the penis from the base to the top like you would an ice cream cone, paying special attention to that little band of tissue where the head meets the body. 

Tip 4: Use Toys

Open-ended sleeves, cock rings, and vibrators specifically designed for penis stimulation can be game changers when it comes to fighting the reflex. Open sleeves and vibrators are particularly helpful because they cover large parts of the penis, leaving you to focus on the head and frenulum. 

A toy can also feel ultra-stimulating, making it easier for your partner to climax and reducing the time you need to spend pleasuring them. 

For the best toys to use during blowjobs, check out my Toys For Pickle Eating collection!